I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
NoShamevember. You game?
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize