This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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