I bet he comes in French.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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