did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
