gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
It's a sad day when you realize you are no longer above fucking in movie theater bathrooms.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
