Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
She just walked out of her bedroom naked and asked me to help put her diaper on. Yeah, that pretty much sums up the last 24 hours...
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
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