is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize
