i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
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