The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
He was very impressed that you could put your hair in a ponytail by yourself while throwing up.
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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