2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
