so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Hey, you can never be fully sure you're straight until you jerk off to gay porn
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
