Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(617): View more from Massachusetts

were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them

Fav 56 5302 1004
share tweet
(901): View more from Tennessee

I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks

Fav 20 6326 864
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(480): View more from Arizona

he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!

(602): View more from Arizona

so its atleast an 8 for creativity.

Fav 22 1682 5943
share tweet
(716): View more from New York

I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.

Fav 23 4897 1655
share tweet
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(615): View more from Tennessee

If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?

Fav 9 4851 1540
share tweet
(323): View more from California

He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated

Fav 7 3365 1094
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(817): View more from Texas

She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis

Fav 13 2889 875
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(519): View more from Ontario

It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit

Fav 0 208 156
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(570): View more from Pennsylvania

So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?

Fav 2 12 30
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT