I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
operation harelip BJ is a go
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Randomize
