I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Randomize
