I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I smell like cotton candy and guilt.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
