does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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