More tranny stories later!
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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