I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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