You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
