He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
