i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Randomize