he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize