would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
We had sex on a dog bed..
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
