Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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