so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
