I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize