I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I stole a fireplace last night.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
Randomize
