just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
Randomize
