are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
Randomize
