u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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