addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
Randomize
