how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
Randomize
