Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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