What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
He sent me a pic of his coffee mug to be like "I'm having coffee too.” \nImagine that. Morning coffee. In your boring ass mug. Dick pic or gtfo.
Randomize
