If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
is it fun? or sober?
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
