we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize