I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize
