May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
I texted her sayin "I gotta brush my teethn then Im omw" maybe hint to do the same
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
