i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I found an inside smoking lounge. I'll be here for the next 4 hours. A nice old Canadian lady has befriended me and let me use her lighter. Fuck Hartsfield-Jackson AND this layover. I win.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mother just made an innapropriate gesture with a cucumber while grocery shopping at whole foods... Then she said "bitches love cucumbers" and all this time i thought i was adopted
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
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