i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
