Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
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