it was like having sex with a tree stump
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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