I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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