I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
How many fucks given?
0.12846
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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