in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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