break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
