Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Just to be clear, the only reason you're allowed to scream "COCKTAIL SERVANT" at bartenders is because you have nice tits
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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