Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I deserve this hangover.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
Randomize
