okay pat passed out under dana's car
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Randomize
