Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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